When you think of the very first Thanksgiving meal and how strange it must have been with the pilgrims and the Indians- sharing food with enemies and trying to create harmony, this Thanksgiving probably won’t be that:).

I’ve been divorced now for 15 years. Those first holidays were so hard and felt so strange. If you are in that place this year, just know that it WILL GET better. You WILL get it figured out. And stop to give thanks for everything YOU DO HAVE this holiday season.

If this is your first year as a stepfamily, enjoy the newness of the season but lower your expectations (and then lower them again).

All family stuff tends to come out at the holiday time. Your kids may be cranky, the ex may be cranky,  your spouse may be acting weird, and any new relatives may add a whole new dynamic to the mix.

What to do? Make sure to exercise early in the day, so your body and mind are more relaxed. Practice saying something that will allow you to get through strange moments like “oh well, we are all doing the best we can!”.

And try to enjoy the meaning of Thanksgiving and lay off the expectations of it being perfect. You will enjoy the small, sweet moments and there are lots of them.

Being thankful is the only requirement on Thanksgiving Day. You can do that any where, anytime and anyplace– with or without anyone.

Some years, my husband and I had all of our brood together plus grandparents, enjoying a hodge podge of food and fun.

Other years, when our children were with their other parents, we’ve taken a trip.  Yes, we  miss our kids, but we are thankful that while they are not with us, they are alive and kicking in this world.

If you are not having your kids this Thanksgiving- try to enjoy your time alone, make a plan for the Thanksgiving day, and do whatever you think is fun….

Let this be a Thanksgiving where you practice the thanking to God, to yourself, and to others.
If there is one thing I’ve learned, there is ALWAYS more to be grateful for than you think there is….

Happy, happy, happy Thanksgiving.